Friday, August 07, 2009

The Robison Wells Drama Continues

I've apparently put my foot in it again without even realizing it.

The other day, I posted a blog detailing some of Rob's (alleged) activities since the proclamation of Rob Wells Day. In that blog, I said, (and I quote myself,)

Another reader reports that he made copies of my blog and sent them by the caseload to his fellow bloggers over at Six LDS Writers and a Frog. He enclosed notes to each of them, his note to the Frog reading: "Take that, fly breath."

I returned home from LDSBA last night to find the following e-mail in my box.

Dear Ms. Pinkston,

We here at the Society for Promoting the Awareness of the Importance of the Proper Treatment of All Amphibians and Likewise-related Creatures (The SPAIPTAALC)were shocked at the callous manner in which you quoted the letter sent by Mr. Robison Wells to The Frog. It is bad enough that the letter was sent in the first place, but to have that level of crassness furthered by you, on your blog, is more than can reasonably be tolerated by our membership.

Perhaps, Ms. Pinkston, you are unaware how difficult it is to be an amphibian in today's society. Indeed, our national spokesfrog Kermit summed it up with his song, "It's Not Easy Being Green," which is sung at every gathering of the SPAIPTAALC. We push forward from day to day, ignoring the slights and the ridicule, doing our best to hold down jobs and provide for the little tadpoles. We harm no one. And yet you, without any thought for our position or feelings, repeated one of the most hurtful insults one can hurl at an amphibian. Shame on you, Ms. Pinkston. Shame on you for your thoughtlessness.

We are hereby canceling our subscription to Tristi Pinkston Weekly and will no longer be frequenting your restaurant in Soho.

Wow. That was pretty harsh. But it's true - I really had no idea I was being so thoughtless, and I do apologize for that. I hope that frogs, toads, salamanders, and their brothers and sisters everywhere can forgive me.

Moving on to happier news, Wednesday morning Kerry Blair moderated an intervention between Rob and the other members of the Six LDS Writers and a Frog team. Rob and the Frog were both reduced to tears as they expressed their love for each other and slapped each other on the back in a man-hug. Jeff, Julie, Stephanie, and Sariah all looked on with approval, and, I dare say, a few tears themselves.

However, I caught this image on film at LDSBA on Wednesday afternoon:As nearly as I can remember, this is how the conversation went.

Jeff: I'm telling you, I don't think Rob's tears were authentic. He can turn them on and off at will, and I think he was just trying to smooth things over. You weren't there. You didn't see it.

James: Whatever, man.

Seriously, folks, I'm really sorry for stirring up this whole hornet's nest. Sheesh, you try to do something nice for someone, and it turns into a whole blog series and you're offending frogs and tears are shed and you just wonder if it was all worth it. I'm rethinking my plan to proclaim September 14th "Peanut Butter Appreciation Day." I can just hear the negative feedback now.


Daron Fraley said...

Very funny!

Kimberly said...

Tristi, I already loved you but now I think I adore you. I thought about reflecting that adoration in a blog post devoted to your wonderfulness, but I fear the potential repercussions...

Tristi Pinkston said...

That's probably for the best, Kimberly. You never know what I might do.

Heather Justesen said...

Very funny, but I swear your portrayal of James and Jeff's conversation must be acurate. It sounds just like them, doesn't it?

I'm sorry about the trauma, and that the frog had to feel so maligned. Maybe this will be a step in the right direction for a better friendship between Rob and the frog.

You know, until Rob realizes he could have cakes decorated with his image on them like the frog gets.

But we'll just keep that between ourselves. Shhhhh.

ali said...

While I'm sorry for the vitriol you were subjected to, Tristi, I'm grateful for the reminder to treat amphibians and their cousins with greater respect. I wouldn't want to hurt their feelings.

Josi said...

You're such a troublemaker, Ms. Pinkston. Who knew?

L.T. Elliot said...

God speed the emotional well being of all amphibians out there. =P

Cindy Beck said...

May the Force be with all those little froggy souls!

(Nice to see you at the LDSBA Convention, Tristi! I'm looking forward to "Secret Sisters" coming out.)

Jen said...

Ha, ha!

Whitney Johnson said...

Luisa (at Novembrance) sent me over here!

Congrats on your many endeavors!

berlinwritergirl said...

Got Agent In Old Lace today! Can't wait to read it!!!

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